I Should Tell My Mom…
Posted by Raymonn | In The Archives of Inspiration, Short Story
That I love her more than I can say at times. Lately as I get older (30), I’ve notice the absence of my mother has grown tremendously in my life. Don’t be alarmed. She’s alive. It’s just that I live in Lincoln, NE with my family and she still lives in Texarkana, AR where I grew up. Texarkana, at the time, had a population of about 60K. Now, its growth has doubled in recent years to about 120K or more. We lived in a rural area call “Triggs.” The “country” my siblings and I would call it. The neighbors house was about a half mile trike down the street. And the nearest grocery store was about a five mile journey on a hot and dusty gravel road. You’d think the grocery store would be the ideal destination, but it lacked an air conditioner. So I’d still be sweaty while picking up the needed groceries to eat dinner. Often times I’d drink my 25 cent “Thirsty Smash” while in the store, take the empty cartoon up to the clerk and pay for it. That’s when I wished I was riding in the Delta 88. It had no air condition as well, no shocks (it bounced - high!), rusted inside and out, cushioned seats was a dream, but at least the winds would have gusted in on my small frame.
The Delta 88 above was the car I wished mom hauled us to all our doctor appointments, grocery shopping, school events, and family visits. Granted this 67′ Delta 88 looks better than the one we were hauled around in. We drove a 71′ Delta 88. Ours wasn’t anything to show off, but my mom wasn’t above it. She made sacrifices that I didn’t realize until I became a grown up. I can truly say that it would’ve been hard for me to be a hero like mom with the given conditions. Single parent, minimum wage job, lived in a trailer house with no heat and air conditioning during the changing seasons among other things, and 3 kids to feed.
You have to learn how to make do with what you have. If you depend solely on high quality material, you’ll be left with tangible objects that retain no value.
She’d say this when I start telling her about all the things my friends told me they had. I’m sure she wanted to provide the same as my friends parents, but she was totally unable to. When young and blinded by the glamour of a J.I. Joe, Ninja Turtles, Transformer toys, and a super soaker, you over look the truth in your situation. My mom worked hard enough to provide food for use to eat and clothes on our back. To add extra toys in to the budget would have set us back and taught me blemished values.
Today I don’t own a J.I. Joe, Ninja Turtle, or a Transformer. But there’s one valuable gift I have complete ownership of. It’s the value in which life is measured upon. Belongings and materials do not have any weight on who you are. Valuing life and the lessons you learn along the way will out last any hard plastic turtles, a raggedy ole Delta 88, and a air conditioner.
“I love you mom more than I can say.” -Raymonn
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May 28, 2009
It was a nice note about your mother. You are fortunate to be from a woman who knew the value of hard work and never took it personally to provide her best for her children.
My mother is from France (Lyons) and I don’t know what it is about the culture there with their kids but she didn’t care too much for my sister and I. My father was Brazilian and after my conception, my folks and my sister who lived in Rio de janeiro, learned that my mothers parents and brothers settled in nebraska to open up a motor company on west O street in Lincoln. I lived in Brazil for a few short years and was raised the rest of my life in Lincoln by an embittered woman, scorned by the man responsible for my sisters life and my life. Since I looked so much like my father I guess she only really saw him and I was often ignored. Tho she was not nearly the caliber of mother I would have wanted her emotional distance taught me the value of independence as well, and the importance of loving those that love you. She was not an awful mother but she wasn’t cut out to do it. I honored her the best I could before I set out on my own at 18 and tried to find my way.
So I appreciate it when a young man speaks highly of his mother and explains through conviction all facets on which his success is a trait of her success. You’re a good man raymonn. Keep up the positive!
May 28, 2009
Thanks Miles.
It’s funny in less than ideal situations we tend to learn positive lessons. When faced with adversity early in your life it becomes a mere hurdle rather than an obstacle. It gets easier to see truth in a dark light when you know there’s always a tomorrow.
May 29, 2009
This is beautiful honey. Your Mama is pretty awesome.